Footprints on our hearts...

February 24, 2015

Footprints on our hearts…

Earlier this week, a couple that is very near and dear to me, had to lay their sweet Fur Baby to rest. Those of you that know me know that I have an extremely soft spot in my heart for any kind of critter, whether furry, fuzzy, or feathered. Those little varmints have a way of completely worming their way into my heart and there’s no way of getting them out. So the thought for this post is about our extended family members and the impact that they have on our lives.

As I have said before, I didn’t have any pets growing up, unless you count the two goldfish that my brother and I had for a small amount of time. They were affectionately known as General Lee and Dixie. Poor Dixie lept out of the fish bowl into the living room floor one night and General Lee didn’t agree with one of the bowl cleanings. I was very little when we had those fish, so I don’t really remember forming any kind of bond to them, if one can even form a bond to goldfish. But, since I have been living on my own I’ve had critters in my life in one form or fashion. 

The first Fur Buddy I had was a 145# Rottweiler named Hooch. He was a huge, gentle, lap dog, that loved Friday night Pizza and Movie nights, loved my Mom, loved playing with pop bottles, loved kids, and truly saved me from losing my ever-loving mind during a rough period in my life. He was my best friend. He was always happy to see me, listened to me and snuggled with me when I was sad, and the only man that he ever liked (other than the fellow that raised him) was my husband, Wayne. Hooch left me on April 4, 1999 and there’s not hardly a day that goes by that I don’t think of him, or something that I used to share with him. We laid him to rest on the hill behind our house, underneath a little patch of dogwood trees that I always figured he’d have loved to have romped in if he’d been able to. 

The next Fur Buddy that came into my life happened as a result of him, finding my husband at work on the morning of April 1, 2001. I got a phone call telling me that he was bringing something home for me that evening, and that it wasn’t an April fool’s joke. When he got home, this fuzzy, speckled Australian Shepherd dog, hopped out of the back of his truck and into our hearts. That big, rotten, fuzzy (and I do mean terribly fuzzy, that poor guy had a heck of a coat of fur), goofy critter, completely won us over and he moved into his fur-ever home. Thanks to the one big, black spot on his side, he was affectionately named Spek. Spek loved to go for rides, whether in the truck or on the boat, he loved all of the grandkids, and he loved falling over on you to get attention and petting – and trust me; all 70 pounds would literally fall over on you. That sweet soul left us during the morning of June 14, 2013 and is laid to rest beside Hooch under the dogwood trees that he did get to lay and romp under.

There are currently twenty-four furry or feathery little (some not so little) souls that depend on us for their food and well-being. Each one of them has a special place in my heart. Some I have bonded with more than others, but each one of them are uniquely special and are completely a part of my life. All three dogs, the cat that just appeared out of nowhere, seven horses, one donkey, and one mule were basically all rescue animals in one form or fashion. One horse and ten chickens were purchased and brought here. But all of them, each furry and feathery one is special and makes my day better just by being around them. I wouldn’t know what to do in a day without Sonny pinning his ears back when I go to put his food in his bucket. Or without PJoe grunting and nickering for his food or for his evening treats. Or without Jasper’s pacing and funny faces before his food pan is put down. Or without Apple Jack meeting me at the water trough begging for treats by sounding like an old model T car trying to start. I wouldn’t know what to do without Abby bouncing around and stopping right in front of me while carrying food out to the horses or even better, when she decides to bounce off of me when I’m pouring food out for the horses. I wouldn’t know what to do without the chickens singing and squawking when I go to feed them and collect their presents every evening, nor would I know what to do if I didn’t have to catch my little Nell chicken and put her in the house every evening. I wouldn’t know what to do without my Molly hugs that I get when I take treats up there, or my Sassy hand-shakes and tail wags. I also don’t know what I’d do without Hanz running everywhere he goes, Ghost being a grumpy old curmudgeon, Harry being, well, Harry, Spirit being a terribly PMS’y female, Maggie being slow and easy, and Mr. Bentley being the kindest, sweetest horse in that field. There are days when doing everything for this brood can be cumbersome and just plain hard, but there are many more days when this brood can completely wipe away all of the bad stuff from the day and make everything smiling and better. 

In this world of way too much crazy, it is very nice to have these furry and feathery babies to share my day with and them letting me share theirs. My life is better by having had all of them in it. While Hooch and Spek are no longer with me in physical form, their personalities and silliness will always be there and the love that I gave them and they gave me will always be in my heart. That will never change no matter how long they’ve been gone. I know that eventually, all of the ones that are with me now will most likely leave me before I leave them, but still, my life has been changed, much for the better, by having them, loving them, and getting to know them. 

For those of you that love animals as much as I do, you know what I’m talking about. These beasties come into your life and eventually leave foot prints (paw, hoof, or claw) all over your heart, but in the end, I know, that I’m better for having loved them. 

This is dedicated to the memories of Hooch, Spek, and sweet Jodi, may you all be romping and running, playing and bouncing. Thank you for loving us and for letting us love you.

Soon after I shared this post, my brother's Fur Baby, Lilly, passed away. So this is also dedicated to Miss Lilly and all the love she shared.

Failure to Communicate

Feb. 18, 2015

“People fail to get along because they fear each other, they fear each other because they don’t know each other; they don’t know each other because they have not communicated with each other.” – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Last month, we celebrated a day of service in remembrance of Dr. King.  It was on that day that a friend of mine posted the above quote on his Facebook page. It truly resonated with me when I read it and the more that I have pondered it since then, the more I think that it completely and totally applies to the here and now, as much, if not more, than it did to the time when it was originally orated. 

Many things have gone through my mind since reading this quote. Our failure to communicate, as a nation; as a race – the human race that is; as parents; as teachers; as employees; as employers; as leaders; as citizens; as any living, breathing person of any race, creed, religion, nationality, origin, etc.; is, in my opinion, presently beyond failure. 

We’ve got children who have no clue how to verbalize a complete and coherent sentence to someone, because the only forms of communication that they have, are text messaging or snap chats. We have leaders – our elected officials – who constantly refuse to communicate with one another and with their constituents in order to enact laws and policies, that are for the good of the nation and the people with in it, whether it be because of “party lines” or “attention seeking”. We have bosses who no longer have the first clue as to how to lead by example, nor communicate to their employees, because they use yelling and intimidation tactics in order to get the “work” done. We have teachers, that instead of being able to truly know their students and impart wisdom upon them, are forced to spend their days with crowded classrooms so they barely have time to know the child’s name, let alone know anything about them, and they are forced to teach to a standardized testing system that is supposed to measure a child’s “progress” in their classes and to hold them accountable for their work. This communication failure goes even further beyond the borders of our own counties, states, country. It is not just a localized issue. 

See, this is a bigger problem than I’d originally thought of when I read Dr. King’s quote. We don’t communicate to one another. If there is any talking done, it is usually “at” someone instead of “with” someone. There is a big difference between listening and hearing, just like there is a big difference between talking with and talking at. What would happen within a school, a county, a state, a country, a company, a world, where people talked to each other, truly got to know one another, and embraced the things that make us all different and all unique? I honestly don’t know if I could even begin to fathom what that might be like. 

I do know that for communication to work, there has to be complete honesty involved; even if that honesty might not be the thing that we really want to hear at the time – I never said it’d be easy. But what would that be like? To deal open and honest with everyone and for all communications to be wholeheartedly participated in by both parties in the honest giving and receiving of information?

I am guilty of the non-communication thing too. I tend to rely on emails and text messaging to communicate with people. I don’t like talking on the phone, and haven’t since my days in sales, but in all actuality, that is a complete cop-out, isn’t it. I am just as guilty of shutting myself off from the world as everyone else. So trust me when I tell you, this article applies to me as well as to anyone else that finds themselves in the same boat . 

What are your thoughts on this? Is there a way that we can begin to truly communicate to one another? I’m interested in what you all have to say. Let me know!

To Tattoo or Not To Tattoo...That is the Question

To Tattoo or Not To Tattoo…That is the question

October 29, 2014

As I was on my way to work one morning last week, I was listening to one of the local radio stations. They were talking about a man who was saying that he had been discriminated against for a job because of his tattoos. I didn’t hear the exact situation that the discussion came from, so I don’t know if this was an editorial piece that was in a newspaper or magazine, or if this was just something that one of the DJ’s had run across and decided to talk about that morning. I do know that some of the comments that he made “rubbed me the wrong way” so-to-speak, and got me to thinking about the whole idea of having or not having tattoos. The DJ made a statement that people who get tattoos do so to set themselves apart from others or to show their individuality. He went on to say that those people shouldn’t be upset when that individuality is recognized and they’re deemed not a team player because of their apparent “individual demonstration” in having the visible tattoos. The DJ also made some comment about how there was no such thing as discrimination against someone for a tattoo. He said discrimination was based on denying someone something based on their race, religion, creed, sex, nationality, etc., not based on a tattoo. After hearing the DJ talk on the radio, I immediately flew into a defensive mode – for myself, for family members, and for many of my friends that have ink and are proud of it.  I wanted to call or email that DJ and give him a big piece of my mind, but decided that would only exacerbate the problem and not offer any help, what so ever. After much thought, I decided that this would be my route of voicing my opinion and open it up for discussion and thoughts from you, the readers.

My Papaw was my first experience with anyone with a tattoo. He served in the military in World War II and while enlisted and abroad, he got his first tattoo. I remember seeing it, tracing my fingers around it, and asking him about it when I was little. His response was always the same, that he thought he’d made a pretty stupid decision in getting it and that he didn’t ever want to see any of us grandkids with one. Papaw has been dead now for a little over 17 years, and unfortunately, I don’t clearly remember the design of the ink in his skin. I do, however, remember that over the years it had faded and some of the lines had blurred a bit, but I always thought that it was interesting and imagined that when he’d gotten it, that it looked very good.

Since then, I’ve met many different people with tattoos. Some had tattoos all over both arms and up the sides of their neck. Some have had dainty butterflies on their ankles, or flowers on their shoulders, or tribal designs on their biceps. I’ve met people that you’d never know had a tattoo. I’ve met people with tattoos who were proud to show off all of their art work – within reason of course. I’ve met people who keep their tattoos covered up. And I, like some of you I imagine, have made a split second decision about a person based on the ink that is visible on them when I first meet them. I’ve also been completely and 100% wrong about many of those people who I’d judged, simply based on their outward appearance. In fact, one of the sweetest, most caring men that my husband and I have ever met had full sleeve tattoos on both arms and multiple tattoos up his neck and behind his ears. I will never forget how bad I felt for prejudging him before I even knew who he really was. 

Most all of the people that I know who have a tattoo, got that ink on their body for a reason. Ask anyone who has tattoos about a certain piece of ink, and they will tell you what it means to them or why they did it. I’m sure there are people out there who got inked as a young person and now they regret it. But most of us, who pay money to an artist to have something put permanently in our skin, have a distinct reason, memory, meaning, or feeling behind it. I liken it to collecting art. Some people choose to collect paintings or sculptures and have them displayed in their homes. Then there are others that choose to carry their art with them, and these are the ones of us who decide to get the art put on our bodies. I’ve known people that get a tattoo as a memorial to a loved one that has passed away. I’ve known several women who have fought and survived breast cancer and have gotten the pink ribbon tattooed on their body as a sign of their victory. I’ve known people who have had their favorite Bible verse tattooed on their body to carry it with them all of the time. I’ve known men that have had full sleeve tattoos because they simply like the art and the look of it. There are usually stories behind someone’s tattoos; a reason why they did it or where they got it done or what it was like to get it.  I’m sure there are people out there who have gotten a tattoo to show their “individuality,” but in my limited experience, I really don’t see that as any kind of issue with tattoos. I have two, and I didn’t get mine because I wanted to be set apart as an individual. I got them because they both have personal meaning to me and I wanted to remember that meaning always. 

I don’t know where the stigma or prejudice against people with tattoos came from. I don’t know how long ago it started or even why it started. I do know that it does exist, and no matter how much people want to deny it, it is there, at the surface, and as I’ve said before, I’ve been guilty of it myself. I also don’t know if this particular DJ has any tattoos himself, but from the tone of his comments, I highly doubt it and I wonder if he’s not one of those people who truly judges books by their covers and doesn’t change that opinion. As I learned from my very tattooed friend, the cover doesn’t always represent who the person is inside. That is true not only for tattoos, but for judging someone based on the clothes that they wear or the vehicle that they drive. I understand that some companies might want to project a specific image with their employees, and if that is the case, then be specific when looking to hire someone. Don’t immediately assume that just because I have twelve piercings, two tattoos, and have been known to ride a Harley complete with the full black leather Harley gear, that I’m not worthy of your time or your good opinion. I also realize that everyone is entitled to their own opinion of matters, and this DJ was entitled to his. He voiced his obvious dislike of tattoos, and in some ways, those who have them. Likewise, I am entitled to defend people like myself, my friends, and my family, who are happily inked and have no problems with them. I am an individual, not because of the holes in my ears or the diamond stud in my nose. I am an individual, not because of the tattoos that are inked into my skin. I am an individual because I am me, and there is only one of me. There will never be another me, and that, in and of itself, sets me apart. 

To get a tattoo or not to get a tattoo is a question many people have asked and may ask themselves at some point in their lives. If you are one of us that choose to get inked, then do be proud of your art. Get it done from a reputable artist and carry that art with you gladly. If you are one that chooses not to ever get a tattoo, that is totally your prerogative, but don’t be judge, jury, and executioner of those of us who have them and decide what kind of person I am based on your perception of me and my ink. 

So, what are your thoughts on tattoos? On having them or not having them? On people who have them? What is your opinion?

Does the "Real World" Suck Your Creativity Away?

Does the “Real World” Suck Your Creativity Away?

July 1, 2014

As I sit here reviewing this blog I see quickly that my last post was mid-April. How sad is that that I haven’t taken time to do anything in roughly 2-1/2 months?  I can assure you, it hasn’t been for lack of trying. I have found over the last 2-1/2 months that the rigors and requirements of everyday life have absolutely sucked away any and all creativity that I had before. 

For those that do not know me, my “real world” job is as a high school teacher.  I teach drafting to 9-12^th grade students. And let me just tell you, being a teacher is NOT the easiest thing to do in the world, even with snow days and summers off. Now while I teach a Career and Technical class as opposed to English or Math, I may have fewer students in a day’s time, but there is still a lot of overwhelming things that have to happen as the school year winds down. When I wrote that last article in April, it was right at the beginning of what I refer to as “silly season” within the school system. This “season” consists of State wide competitions for various things; SOL (Standards of Learning) testing where students are out of class or are in class longer depending upon how the day’s schedule is altered; certification tests for Drafting credentials (basically a Drafting SOL); end of school picnics; senior activities; awards days; studying for final exams; taking the final exams; and all of the year end paperwork. Even though this was the 8^th year that I’ve done this, for some reason, this year’s end of the year work seemed to be way more taxing on my brain and especially on my creativity.

Now, for the last 2-1/2 months, I have not been able to concentrate long enough to create anything. I had noticed that I’d even stopped singing in the car (my practice studio) and that is one of my most favorite things to do to get revved up for work and to wind down from the work day. It seemed like there wasn’t time to actually accomplish anything and that’s odd because there was the same amount of time in the day as there was 8 years ago when I did it the first time and survived.  I don’t think that I’m the only one that was feeling that stress and all that anxiety at the end of this year. It seemed that many of us in my building were feeling the same thing. 

As of today, I’ve been out of school for right at three weeks. I should be rested and rejuvenated by now but I still feel stressed and overwhelmed by all that needs to be done. The grass needs mowing – by the time I finish mowing, it’s just about time to start it all up again. I have 3 flower beds that need to be reclaimed – I need to seriously work on weed removal. I have 3 horses that I am trying to get under saddle before the end of July. We are still in the process of mowing and baling the first cutting of hay. The barn needs to be finished. The cage around the chicken coop needs to be finished. The trim around the ceiling in the kitchen needs to be painted and a few places on the walls touched up. There are about 1,000 things inside the house – other than general cleaning and laundry – that needs to be done. The siding on the house needs to be washed along with all the windows. The deck needs to be washed and sealed before winter. The shed needs to be cleaned out and many, many things thrown away. The roof on the storage building needs to be patched before winter. And the list goes on, and on, and on, and on, and…. Well, you get the idea.

I’m not sure what one has to do to find balance in all of the everyday activities and requirements that we all face. I’m not sure how to get everything done and still find time for self and for a moment of creativity and enjoyment. My mind is starting to feel a little free-er than it has in the past couple of months, but still not 100% as it was before. I know that I don’t like it when I’m not creative. I don’t like it when I’m not writing or singing or living in some imaginary land in my mind. I’ve become complacent and lackadaisical and neither of those is who I really am.

With this post, I’m hoping that I can slowly get things back on track in my mind. I hope that I can find that inner spark that keeps me wanting to do new and different things and that keeps me up beat and spunky. I’m hoping to dig back into the imaginary lands that my co-writer and I have created and finish some projects that we’ve been working on! And I hope to stop letting the real world junk suck away my creativity!! Stay tuned and see what happens!

Pay Attention

Pay Attention

April 14, 2014 

I have been a licensed driver both in the State of Virginia and the State of Tennessee for many years now. Up to this point, I’ve had one speeding ticket and thank the Good Lord above; I’ve not had any accidents. Up until a few years ago, I had never really given much thought to the subjects that I would like to talk about today. But, having been on the other end of both situations, I thought they would be valid topics and something a little different. 

We are all taught to not let things distract us while we are driving – however in this ever changing, instant gratification society with cell phones, we are constantly connected with texts, emails, calls, etc. that all come flying at us when we’re behind the wheel – it seems nearly impossible to not get distracted even if only for a second or two.  When I pass drivers that are paying more attention to their phone than to their driving I just want to have a loud speaker on my car where I can scream at them to “Shut up and Drive!!!”  Alas, as agitated as I get with the cellphone drivers, this is still not either of the two subjects for this writing. 

Where I live is very rural. There are all types of farms all around the area. Farms mean tractors, hay wagons, trucks pulling trailers, and this kind of thing on the road with all of the regular traffic. I have always tried to be respectful to the farmers that I’ve passed along the road. Like when I get behind the big tractor of my dairy farmer neighbor out on the main road, I slow down, put my flashers on, and laze behind him until he turns off or until I do. He’s got just as much right to be out on that road as I do. But until my husband and I started doing some minor (very minor) farming of our own, I had never really paid much attention to how my fellow road riders treat slower moving or loaded down vehicles. 

In my eighteen plus months of dealing with horses, I’ve only ever ridden in a truck pulling a loaded horse trailer twice. I have never driven a vehicle pulling a horse trailer period. Now common sense would tell that it is harder to stop a vehicle pulling a trailer even if that trailer is empty. Even if that trailer has brakes of its own, they still will not stop on a dime. Also, if you’re not very careful, that trailer could jack knife and come around the side of the truck, and possibly flip over if you try to stop too quickly. But, if you have livestock – horses, cows, etc. – in a trailer you really cannot stop suddenly as you’ll cause the animals to fall and possibly be seriously injured. Now I don’t know how many of you reading this know much about horses, but that trailer floor is not skid resistant and their hooves are not like the non-skid treads on the bottom of your favorite hiking boots. I can also just about guarantee you, that as soon as you load a horse into a trailer one of the first things they’re going to do is poop and more than likely, before you get to your destination, they’re going to pee. Keep in mind that all of this goes on the floor of the trailer and that does not help in any way, shape, or form with the slippery part. So combine the moving trailer with a slippery floor and an animal that doesn’t have non-skid boots on, and you’ve got a possibility any time you put one in a trailer of getting one seriously hurt. For any of you out there that have hauled animals, I’m sure you’ll agree with me that the load you’re hauling is far more valuable than any ding-dong that pulls out in front of you. So my words of advice to those drivers out there not hauling animals around in a slippery, moving box behind your truck: PAY ATTENTION to what you’re doing when you see these vehicles coming toward you. Remember that they can’t stop quickly. Remember that all turns and some curves are going to be taken wider than a normal vehicle. Remember that the left wheel of the trailer will generally need to stay on the yellow line in the middle of the road so that the right wheel doesn’t run off the shoulder. Remember that you need to not follow so closely behind that trailer – you are not practicing your NASCAR drafting, as you will not be able to stop if something happens with that truck/trailer combination. Remember that if you’re stopped behind one of these vehicles at a red-light that more than likely, the driver is going to let the vehicle ease back ever so slightly as the gears engage and it starts to pull off – you cannot burn rubber with a load of animals in a trailer. But MOST IMPORTANTLY, remember, if you cause me to wreck because you’re being stupid and you hurt one of my animals, you’d better be prepared for my wrath unless said wreck completely knocks me out or kills me in the process (I’m betting that last statement goes for any animal lover who is transporting their beloved pets). 

Whilest on the subject of farming and trailers, not only do you need to pay attention to trailers full of animals, but trailers hauling tractors/farm equipment and trailers hauling loads of hay. Same thing applies here for the not being able to stop part but with hauling hay, that’s usually done by pulling a hay wagon which is NOT your typical trailer. These wagons were not meant for speed. They were simply meant to follow behind a tractor/baler combination and carry bales of hay to the barn. For some farmers, their hay fields are miles away from their barns and that requires them to pull these loaded hay wagons up and down roads to get to their destination. These wagons also tend to weave as they get up to a certain speed on paved surfaces, which makes them a little more difficult to handle. Same “Remembering” rules apply to this to. I guess more than anything to remember here is just simple, common courtesy. These folks have a right to be out on the road. Sure the speed might not be that fast and sometimes they take up the majority of the road. But really, is it going to kill you to pull over to the edge of the road to let them pass or to be more courteous or patient while they’re traveling near you on the roads?

The other rant that I have for this writing is to pay attention to those riding motorcycles. With the warmer weather now, there will be more and more of these on the roads. As a car driver, I’d never really paid much attention to the motorcycle riders. As a motorcycle rider/driver however, I most definitely paid attention to being out on the road with all of the bigger, enclosed vehicles. Trust me when I tell you, even though motorcycles are smaller and do not weigh as much as a car, they are twice as hard to stop as your average car or SUV. You CANNOT stop quickly on a bike. If you do, one of two things is going to happen. You’re either going to lock up the front brakes and go over the handlebars, or you’re going to lock up the back brakes and lay the thing down. Either way, you’re going to wind up with road rash – even if you’ve got on leathers – and quite possibly a concussion – even if you’re wearing a helmet – or worse. So DON’T pull out in front of an oncoming bike just because you think you’ve got plenty of time and you’re bigger than the bike is. Keep in mind when you’re on a multilane highway that a motorcycle rider could possibly be in your blind spot as you start to change lanes so look and look carefully. Some motorcycle models don’t have a loud Harley sound to them so you might not even know that one is nearby. Trust me when I tell you that that rider is not only focusing on operating that bike, but they’re also focusing on the mass of vehicles around them. It is not an easy job. Do not tailgate a motorcycle in any way, shape, or form. You never know when something could go wrong or when the driver could lose control of the bike. Would you be able to live with yourself knowing that you’d just run over someone because you were playing “It’s Bristol Baby” on the local highway? Remember to PAY ATTENTION to these riders out there. Be sure that if you see a large group pass you by that you wait a few extra moments to make sure that they all have passed by. Again, it is simple, common courtesy that needs to be followed when out there on the highways!!

I know that there are many days when I get to the house and don’t remember anything of my roughly seventeen mile trip. We all have tons of things on our minds, we get distracted by a phone call or text message sounding on our cell phones, we’re paying too much attention to singing the song on the radio at the top of our lungs, or any other number of possible things that could detract from the job of driving a 7,000 pound speeding bullet down the highway. All’s I’m really saying here is PAY ATTENTION to what’s around you. Look out for each other and think that one day you might be that person pulling a trailer full of livestock that needs a break from the drivers around them, or you might be that person pulling a fully loaded, weaving hay wagon down a curvy road where everyone you pass wants to crowd you, or you might be that motorcycle rider that everyone and their brother has pulled out in front of on any given day. Ask yourself if you’d be rednecking those drivers if it was your dad, mom, brother, sister, grandma, grandpa, or anyone else that you hold near and dear to you; because that rider or driver is someone’s mother, father, sister, brother, friend, wife, husband. That license that we carry in our wallets that says that we are legal drivers of those motor vehicles are more than just a piece of plastic – or at least they should be more. They should also remind us that we’re responsible when we are out there on the road, not only for our own safety but for the safety of those that we pass. Don’t be the distracted car driver that takes out a motorcycle because you reach down to check the newest text message on your phone. Don’t be the one that is responsible for someone having to put down several horses because you caused the truck and trailer hauling them to wreck and they’re hurt more seriously than they can be helped by conventional medicine. 

So…PAY ATTENTION…and come back to read another blog story/rant at a later date!!

Stay Safe Out There!!!!